NOVEMBER

Here we are in November already, approaching Thanksgiving and gearing up for all the wonderful pigskin rivalries that only add to this spectacular holiday, where we all ultimately take one last deep breath and brace ourselves for the Christmas season. This time of year is often just referred to as "the holidays" in general and it's no wonder. Halloween, Election Day, and Veteran's Day have all come and gone and here we are bracing ourselves for more.

As far as the evangelical church is concerned, Halloween is often either celebrated in the church, minus the witches, ghosts, and goblins, or is completely shunned. Growing up, I was met by a mixed bag in the church. Whispers of the urban legend about razor blades in apples gave the church the mission of having trick or treating in the fellowship hall, all the kids lining up to go to different spots for candy instead of canvasing the neighborhood. Fortunately, my pastor (my father) was cool enough to recognize the harmless nature of the holiday and took my brother and I out in creative costumes my mom always designed and helped us build. Today, it appears that churches still for the most part toe the same line. Some agree, and some don't. Whether Victory Baptist Church in Deptford, NJ agrees or disagrees with the holiday, they used the heightened awareness of the holiday to advertise the devil and his schemes, using a cute little pun to point out how not all treats are good ones. Some, as the sign suggests, are lined with razor blades with the name lucifer all over it.

Less than a week after Halloween came election day, that wonderful time of year where we all get to choose the lesser of two evils. The church, though it should be, is rarely ever quiet during this time of year, as some pastors overstep their bounds to endorse candidates or promote a particular political agenda. Others, like some evangelicals in Texas, decide to advertise their saviour instead of a political candidate. In this particular case, the DC sniper shootings were the inspiration as numerous signs appeared in town, advertising "Jesus is God, not Allah." Now, that would be an election that people might actually show up to the polls for. Imagine all the Christian church boards advertising, "Jesus for king of the world 2002." Well, it sounds a bit far-fetched, but in the last presidential election a church in Pennsylvania did have the message, "A Jew for VP. How about a Jew for King of the World."

Veteran's Day usually carries a certain sense of reverance, unlike the previously observed holidays and so for the most part sign boards were advertising tender messages recognizing the people who have fought and died for our country. "Firefighters Rescue, Jesus Saves," was seen on one sign board, and while many firefighters are also Veteran's, it's probably better I didn't see some cute pun made about Veteran's advertising an evangelical message.

Sending cards is a holiday tradition typically reserved to this time of year, and birthdays of course. For those of us who like to make our own cards because we feel they are more special this way, the comparison of God to Hallmark cards on a sign outside a chuch in Minotola, New Jersey might not click immediately, but once it does, I assure you, it still isn't funny.

As Thanksgiving and Christmas approach, surely the pastors all over the country will be ready with a witty comment, a plethora of puns taken from the almighty church sign book, or even a unique word or two to place on those wonderful signs. If you see any, drop us a line at matt@tangzine.com.

In a struck of luck, I recently spotted a sign that will go perfectly with this monthly column. While driving in North Arlington, NJ, it was there staring me down on the side of the road. I leave you with that one to ponder until next time, because you never know, one of these signs that we like to chuckle over, scratch our heads in disbelief at, even scream "What the?" at the top of our lungs at the site of, may in fact be a sign from the almighty God.

posted 11-23

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Matt Ralph is the editor and chief writer of Tangzine. Enough said. E-mail him at matt@tangzine.com

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